As I am sitting in the Drs office this past week and hearing him tell me what my reality is, I want to punch him in his face. I don't want to listen to anything that he has to say, even though I know I HAVE to!
Reality has set it. The time has come when I am faced with having to detox. Detox from a sleeping medication that I have been prescribed for 5 YEARS! A medication that a person should only be using for 2 WEEKS! My Drs have knowingly been giving me this medication with no questions asked for 5 years. I am addicted. I am an addict. I cannot break the cycle to stop this on my own. This is a narcotic.
I feel like a drug addict that no longer has a drug dealer. I cannot just contact my Dr and tell them I need more meds. They is no longer there. They are no longer willing to give me this drug.
Instead of doing an impatient detox I am doing an outpatient. My body needs impatient. BUT, there is no magic medication that can help with the withdrawls of Ambien. It is not like a street drug. I can't just take methadone to rid of withdrawls like you can with heroine. The Drs are working amazingly to help keep the withdrawls at a minimum and also with less heath risks as possible.
It is not going to be an easy few months. It is going to take that long to wean off of the Ambien. We have to go slowly or it can cause seizures or heart attacks. For a woman, I am on a very high dose. And I take it EVERY night. It is so unsafe. Im realizing this now. The effects that this is having on my body is horrible. It is to the stage now where it is not even working and it is causing more harm that it is good.
Im not one to talk about struggles like this, but this is a topic I feel is important. I never in a million years would have admitted that I am an addict, especially to a drug that I am receiving from my Drs every month. This drug is suppose to help me sleep, not cause the issues that it is now.
All I ask of my family and friends is patience. Patience as my emotional roller coaster is all out of whack for a few months. It is going to take time, and we all know how well I do with things taking time!! Its going to be a struggle for all of us but patience needs to be on our side. <3
